From a very young age, they are required to put on a lot of rigid labels: be brave, don't cry, be strong and look like men. But in fact, are they really not afraid of suffering and pain?

They just broke their teeth and swallowed them, trying to control their emotions. But if someone understands him enough so that he can vent to you happily, then you are his closest and most trusted person and your breakthrough.

first of all, I can tell you directly that reason is heartless! At this time, don't think that his mood is more calm and stable, and just conclude that he is determined.

This kind of cognition is relatively subjective. This note will be fully elaborated from three aspects, and at the end of the note, it will focus on the real psychological activities of the other party's heart and the reasons behind it.

if you are sure that TA is worth fighting for, please be sure to see the end.

when TA says, don't bother me anymore! Actually, I want a calm space. When TA said: I'm really tired! One is actually the need for concern and empathy.

so, don't be scared away by the negative emotions of TA's resistance, but you can dig out his real needs from it.

first of all, you should understand the man's thinking (that is, why the other person's behavior always makes you feel incomprehensible.

Male thinking doesn't just refer to male thinking. In fact, there are many female friends who also have this kind of "male thinking"

just like the existence of hormones. Only in men, "the man's thinking" is particularly obvious. Let me give a simple example. When the man's thinking encounters emotional problems, he will subconsciously spread his attention to the overall view of the whole event, and then ignore the details in the problem, and he is better at sorting out the ins and outs of things.

To some extent, it inhibits emotional expression and enlarges logical thinking.

So in our eyes, we will think that they are "rational", and this seemingly rational feeling gives people the feeling that, for you in love, it is "impersonal" and appears unfeeling. However, the reason is ruthless! Now, from the perspective of men, I deeply analyze the people who have "man thinking". What are they thinking after being lovelorn? First of all, TA will have a feeling of relief, which means that he doesn't have to face her. He can do whatever he wants, sleep whenever he wants, and don't return if he doesn't want to, and don't care about the feelings of the other party (current state: reason). He will feel a little lost after a period of self-release, but soon his intuitive consciousness will try to restrain this lost emotion (current state: restrain emotional expression). I gradually realize that I really seem to be alone. But he won't cry to his brother. He will ask his brother to play ball games or games. In this way, he can escape the sad mood more directly. And for a long time to come, you think that "he is determined" because once he has such a sad mood, his intuitive consciousness will try to "press it down" and tell himself that "separation is the most appropriate way to solve the problem, because the other party can't change, and each other is very tired, and this is the most correct decision".

Therefore, the way and attitude of "man's thinking" in dealing with problems are based on the "overall view", sorting out the logical lines and orderliness, and then "finding ways" to deal with them.

but this is the way the man thinks, and it is straightforward, even though these "measures" make you look like you are running away.

Why do you think the other person is heartless? Because it's wrong for you to look at men from your own point of view! What you see is the apparent behavior of the other person after restraining his emotions, but what you can't see is his true inner feelings.

this is a typical feminine thinking.

The woman pays more attention to details, according to which she produces emotional fluctuations, and finally expresses her inner feelings through emotions.

In a relationship, you may express your emotions directly, such as crying, quarreling, complaining and accusing ... but it is difficult for men to express their emotions directly like you.

So you think he is cold and unfeeling because the other person doesn't show the same emotions as you? Don't you think he's wronged? Men and women are born with differences in thinking. Of course, these differences do not mean who is right or wrong, let alone who is better than who.

So it's actually that you misunderstand each other, and think that being rude means not thinking from each other's point of view? As a matter of fact, most men not only can't fully take care of girls' emotions, but also lack the ability to express their bad emotions, so when they look calm on the surface, they are even a little indifferent, but they may have been unable to bear the present results in their hearts.

It's just that their emotions are rarely expressed as directly as "women's thinking". Even if there is a simple expression, it will soon pass. So you can't perceive the emotion of "male thinking", just because it is hidden deeply and I don't want you to know it.

Behind men's unfeeling thinking are emotional outbursts that have accumulated for a long time. io

Because unlike women's thinking, they express their emotions directly after they are generated, and their thinking mode does not agree with them to express their emotions at will. Therefore, male thinking will not stick to the small details and small problems in front of us. "Male thinking" is more like an integral companion horse. His integral is not counting the number of times you made mistakes, but accumulating the bad emotions you brought over a period of time. The bad mood will not disappear naturally, but will only accumulate more and more. Until the critical value appeared, the bad mood accumulated to the peak, and broke out through the critical value, just like the face of a coin, one side either escaped or confronted.

When he chooses to escape, he will pretend as if nothing happened, look free and easy, and make some strings that make him feel happy. If you go to him at this time, the other person will probably ignore you because he is escaping.

when he chooses the confrontational side, he will look more rational, calm and heartless than his usual self. If you go to him at this time, you will only get a cold attitude and indifferent words. Do you understand at this time? The "appearance" you see is just "appearance".

The true thoughts of men's thinking are hard to really feel if you can't try to figure them out rationally.

Write at the end: No kind of thinking is inherently indifferent. How many storms have occurred behind every seemingly calm event?

If you can't calmly analyze and ponder carefully, please stand in one-sided thinking to understand, label and draw conclusions.

in the end, it will only run counter to your original intention.