I was thirteen years old when I first met An Sheng in July.

At the freshman registration meeting, many strange students lined up. It was a hot autumn afternoon, and the bright sunshine was dazzling. Suddenly a girl turned to July and said, let's go around the playground. The girl's smile is happy. July ran away with her for no reason.

After a long time, July told Jia Ming that between her and An Sheng, she was the result of a choice. It's just that she wants to

Although she wants to, she can't explain more.

My name is July. When Anson asked her, July told her that it was the month of her birth. It was very hot that summer. For mother, high temperature and dystocia are a disaster. But she gave July a bland name.

Just like many things in the world. People can't guess the undercurrent from its silent appearance. For example, the encounter between one person and another. Or their differences.

And Ansheng, she said, just confirmed her life. She spread out July's palm, drew simple strokes with her fingertips, and had a self-deprecating smile on her face. This is the first time they have met. The autumn afternoon sunshine jumps on Ansheng's back. Like a flock of lively birds flapping their wings and flying away.

At that time, she had not told July that she was a child without a father. Her mother gave birth to a child for a man. Because she loves him, she is destined to keep her mouth shut for him all her life. I didn't tell Ansheng in July. At that moment, Ansheng's name had left a mark on her hand.

Because of Ansheng, summer has become a season full of illusion and confusion.

Thirteen to sixteen. It was July and Ansheng went hand in hand for three years.

Sometimes July is the shadow of An Sheng. Sometimes An Sheng is the shadow of July. Do homework together. Run to the store to see underwear. On weekends, An Sheng goes to her house for dinner and stays overnight in July.

You should hold hands when walking on the road.

When I first went to Ansheng's house in July, I felt that Ansheng was very lonely.

An Sheng lives alone in a big apartment. Her mother is abroad all the year round. Hired a nanny to live with An Sheng. An Sheng's room is decorated like a princess's palace, and the wardrobe is full of beautiful clothes. But it looks cold because there is no one.

I felt shivering after sitting for a while in July. An Sheng turned on the air conditioner and all the lights. She said that she often does this when she is alone. Then she took July to see a tank of tropical fish raised by her mother. When Ansheng threw down the feed, the beautiful little fish trembled like colorful silks and satins.

An Sheng said that the water here is warm. But some fish, they will cross the cold ocean in droves and migrate to vast distances. Because that's their home.

An Sheng looked gloomy at that time.

In school, Ansheng is a headache for teachers. He is sharp-tongued and unruly, and is often driven out of the classroom because of fighting with the teacher. The young Ansheng sat alone in the open space outside the classroom. The sun shone on her stubborn face. In July, I secretly took out novels and plum blossoms from my schoolbag and threw them to An Sheng outside the window. Then she knew that Ansheng would run to her nest to read a book.

That's the big tree they found on the playground in the afternoon after school. Very old camphor tree, the leaves will give off a pungent smell.

An Sheng kicked off her shoes and climbed to the top of the branch in a few minutes. She hid in the bushes like a bird. Shaking two naked calves, overlooking the empty grass and the distance on the playground. July asked her what she could see. She said there were green rivers, fields covered with golden daisies and stone bridges. A long, long railroad track, I don't know where it leads.

Then he held out his hand to her and shouted, Come on, July. July looked up and twisted her fingers, excited and scared. But she never learned to climb trees with Ansheng.

Finally, one day, they decided to see the railway. They walked for a long time. I haven't walked into that field until the twilight is blurred. It suddenly rained heavily on the road. Two girls hid in a broken thatched cottage by the roadside. July said, let's go home. An Sheng said, I'm sure I'll arrive soon. I have vowed to walk on this railway that I can see every day. So in the heavy rain, two girls flew forward with umbrellas. Skirts and shoes are soaked to the skin. Finally, I saw the long tracks. Spread to the vast distance in the twilight and rain and fog. The daisies in the field have withered.

An Sheng's hair and face were covered with rain. She said that in July, one day, I will get rid of all the shackles and go further.

Looking down in July is a bit sad. She said, what about me? An Sheng said, you come with me.

Peace in July

She seems to have made plans for July.

Graduated from junior high school, 16 years old. I was admitted to the best key middle school in the city in July.

An Sheng went to vocational high school and studied advertising design.

Became an outstanding girl in the school in July. Good grades, good temper and beautiful. She joined the school literature club. Although the composition often wins prizes in competitions, she knows that the person who really writes well is An Sheng. They borrowed a large set of foreign novels to read, and their favorite writer was Hemingway. It's just that An Sheng always disdains to take part in these activities.

And her composition is always criticized by the teacher as unhealthy decadence.

July seems a little lonely without Ansheng's company. The first meeting of the Literary Association was held in early July. The classroom where the meeting was held was full of sunshine and osmanthus. A boy is writing on the blackboard. July pushed open the door and said, I'm sorry. Then the boy turned and said, July, come in for a meeting. His smile is gentle.

Su Jiaming is the most handsome man I have ever seen around July 16 years old.

After meeting in July, I couldn't help saying to Ansheng, what kind of man do you like? An Sheng said, I won't like men. Duras said that unless you love this man very much, men can't stand it. As she spoke, she took out a cigarette to smoke. An Sheng has already started to work. She has long lost interest in learning.

She went to McDonald's as a timekeeper, to a bar as a waiter to chat with foreigners, and to the Academy of Fine Arts to study oil painting. She can't wait to get rid of her lonely life. I just want to constantly experience new things and experiences in my life. In order to sketch in the mountains with a group of students from the Academy of Fine Arts, she skipped school 1 month. The school will expel An Sheng for this reason. Mother Ansheng appeared for the first time. Solve the trouble brought by Ansheng. I also met with July.

She is wearing a delicate wide-brimmed satin cheongsam and a small diamond ear pin, and her voice is very feminine. She said, July, you two should be together. I will go back to England soon. You must control her. July said, An Sheng wants you to stay with her. Why don't you stay? She smiled and let out a sigh. Many things are not as free as you children think.

I don't understand. In July, she just felt calm and lonely. An Sheng refuses to leave every time she comes to her house. Eat together and sleep together. She likes the warm lights and sounds in the room. In July, there are four people in her family: her parents and her brother. An Sheng will spoil everyone.

Looking at Ansheng's mother in July. I think she looks like An Sheng's room. Empty and gorgeous. Cold goes deep into the bone marrow.

That night, at home in July, I had dinner with my parents and my brother, and I felt very warm. She thought, she has more things than An Sheng. She doesn't know what she can give Ansheng. It rained at night, and I was revising the article in the July school magazine, vaguely remembering the smiling faces in the sunshine and osmanthus fragrance. Jia Ming likes her very much and invites her to the movies on weekends. Maybe it would be better for Ansheng to fall in love with someone.

Late at night, I heard a knock at the door in July. When she opened the door, she saw An Sheng, who was soaked to the skin, leaning against the door frame with her hands on her chest.

She left. An Sheng said to July with a straight face. I took the plane at night.

In July, I boiled hot milk for Ansheng, put hot water on her and took clean clothes. After Ansheng lay down, she closed her eyes and said nothing.

In July, I turned off the light and slowly lay beside Ansheng. Suddenly she hugged her tightly. She buried her head in July's arms and sobbed like an animal. Warm and sticky tears flowed down July's neck. Hug her in July. All right. Be quiet, be good. Everything will be fine. We will grow up. It will be fine when you grow up.

Talking and crying in the dark in July.

Go to the movies with Jia Ming in July. After walking out of the theater, I remembered that An Sheng told her that she was working the night shift in the nearby blue bar. Jia Ming, let's go to see An Sheng. I mentioned my best friend to him in July.

Jia Ming said, good. He gently put July's hand into his coat pocket in the night wind. Both are quiet and gentle people.

So even in key middle schools, teachers don't have any opinions. Because they are all students with excellent grades and personalities. See the ancient blue carved wooden door in the distance. As soon as I pushed it away, deafening music and choking smell of tobacco came to my face. The narrow dance floor was crowded with dancers. Others play cards or chat. In July, Jia Ming took his hand and squeezed into the circle. He asked a long-haired man who was mixing wine. Is An Sheng there? The man looked up at July coldly, and then shouted, Wei Wei, someone is looking for you.

Then a girl appeared from the crowd.

In the dim light, July almost didn't recognize this as An Sheng. A thick dark hair is tied into bundles of braids, and the hair is slightly decorated with colored glass beads. Silver eye shadow, purple mascara, burgundy lipstick. Wearing a black cut-out lace top, she tightened her beautiful chest. An Sheng paused at the first sight of Jia Ming. Then he smiled at July and said, Let's have a drink.

Peace in July

Heineken with ice, Jia Ming drank a bottle. Then he asked Ansheng if he would like to skip class for a month to sketch.

An Sheng said, we are making coffee in wild fire. Take a bath in a cold stream. Lying in a sleeping bag at night watching the stars all over the sky. At that moment, I asked myself, what am I living for?

When I look at the starry sky, I will think that life may be like this. When I came back, I painted an oil painting "Starry Night". There are dark blue and tearful stars on the canvas. Someone asked me if I could sell it for 100 yuan. I said sell.

Why not sell it? It is valuable when it reaches people who can understand it.

An Sheng finished reading Jia Ming. She said, Jia Ming, your eyes are very bright. Jia Ming smiled.

After sending July to the door, Jia Ming said that An Sheng was an unpleasant girl.

But she is like a plant with a strange and rich fragrance. Will produce frightening fuzzy flowers.

On July's birthday, Jia Ming wants to take July to climb mountains in the suburbs. In July, Ann said that she would accompany me every birthday. Jia Ming said, of course we can be with Ansheng.

An Sheng and Jia Ming happily rode their broken bikes to the suburbs in July. When I climbed to the top of the mountain, I found a small temple on it. The sun is shining brightly. On that day, An Sheng wore faded jeans, a white shirt, barefoot and a pair of sports shoes, and returned to her usual round appearance. Jia Ming and July are wearing white T-shirts. An Sheng suggested that everyone take off their shoes, sit barefoot on the steps of the mountain road and let the camera take a selfie. Everyone took a group photo with joy and then walked into the temple.

It's a little weird here. Said in July. She felt that there was a mysterious atmosphere in this small temple, deep and decadent.

She said she was tired and didn't want to climb up to see the Buddha statue. I'll take care of the bag and camera. Come down when you're finished.

Jia Ming and An Sheng climbed the high steps and walked into the dark and cool hall. An Sheng sat on the futon, looked at the Buddha and said, Do they know everything? Jia Ming said, maybe. He looked up and felt the wind and sunshine passing through the empty eaves. Then he heard An Sheng say softly, Do they know that I like you?

I saw Jia Ming and An Sheng walking down slowly in July. She smelled the fragrance of flowers in the wind and thought it was her happiest moment. The man she loves and her best friend are all around her. Many years later, July realized that this was her happiest time. It's just that nothing can solidify at the best moment.

Jiaming, jade bracelets are being sold in the temple. July said, I just went to see it alone. It's beautiful. An Sheng said, OK, let Jia Ming send one. There are only two left. One is light green inlaid with dark green, and the other is brown and yellow with white silk thread. Jia Ming said, which one do you like in July? Said in July, also want to buy it for Ann. Which one does An Sheng like?

An Sheng looked at it and quickly nodded at the white one and said, I want this.

She put a white bracelet on her wrist and happily put it in the sun. It's really good, July. In July, I was also happy to see my child safe. I still remember the ancients saying that rings jingle, and whether two bracelets make a nice sound when put together. Halfway up the mountain, An Sheng had another whim.

Come on, July, bring your green bracelet and let me have a try.

An Sheng happily put the green bracelet she picked in July on her wrist.

It was a moment. As soon as the two bracelets touched, the white bracelet broke in two and fell off.

The mountain road is covered with white jade chips.

An Sheng stood there. Only the green bracelet that belongs to July in her hand is still shaking gently. Jia Ming is pale.

In July, I'm leaving.

An Sheng told me in July that I would go to Hainan to work and then go to Beijing to study oil painting.

In autumn, An Sheng decided to drop out of school and leave the city where she had lived for 17 years. She said, I'll go with Pan.

Pan wants to turn off the blue light. Is it the man with long hair? Asked in July. Yes He can mix wine, play saxophone, drive fast and draw pictures. I like him very much. An Sheng lowered her head and smiled gently.

A man, you must love him very much to put up with him.

Can you stand him?

I don't know. An Sheng pulled out a cigarette. She started smoking heavily. Sometimes painting an oil painting leaves a dozen cigarette butts in one night. But Ansheng, your mother begged me to control you. Hold her in July.

It's none of her business

An Sheng cursed rudely. Whether she exists or not has nothing to do with me. An Sheng took a cold drag on his cigarette. I hate her. The person I hate most is her father, whom I have never met.

July bowed his head sadly. She remembers that when she was a child, they ran to the tracks in the rain. She said, An Sheng, what about me? You will enter the university and have a good job. And Jia Ming, of course. She smiled and said, tell me, will you marry him? July?

On July 4, He Ansheng

Yes If he doesn't want to change, July is a little shy. After all, there is still a long time.

Not long. It won't be long. An Sheng looked up at the window. I don't know how far forever is.

Maybe everything is short-lived.

On the day when An Sheng left, she took an overnight train. She wants to save money. She is used to a hard life. Appen has already arrived in Hainan first. An Sheng left alone.

An Sheng only carried a simple luggage bag. Still wearing old jeans and a down jacket. At the beginning of July, I was a little numb, just staring blankly at An Sheng checking her luggage, checking in and getting on the bus to sort things out. She gave Anson the washed group photo. That picture is very good. Sunny, three young smiling faces. Full of love.

Jia Ming is really handsome. An Sheng smiles at July. Put the photo in your coat pocket.

At this time in July, I saw a red silk thread sticking out of her neck. What is this? She took it out and looked at it. This is a jade pendant. Jade brand is very old. One corner is still a little incomplete. The whole piece of white has been covered with light yellow. An Sheng said, I found it at a stall in Chenghuang Temple. Avoid evil spirits for yourself. She quickly put the pendant into her clothes.

July, you should be fine, you know. I will write it.

The whistle sounded and the train began to slowly leave the platform. An Sheng leaned her head out of the window and waved to July. In July, I felt a sharp pain in my heart, and suddenly realized that Ansheng was leaving her. An Sheng, who goes to school, eats and sleeps together, will never be seen again.

An Ansheng followed the train in July. An Sheng, don't go.

On the empty platform, July cried and squatted down.

It's time to go home, July Jia Ming, who came in a hurry, hugged July.

Yes, Jia Ming. Time to go home. July held Jiaming's warm hand tightly. Jia Ming put her cold hand in her pocket. And bury her face in her arms. There are bright tears in his eyes.

Jia Ming, no matter what, we have been together, don't separate, ok. July asked him in a low voice.

Jia Ming was silent for a while, and then gently nodded.

Except Ansheng.

An Sheng is a person who has no home and no commitment. Think about July.

It's just that she never knows what she can share with Ansheng.

Graduated from high school, age 19 July, admitted to the university to study economics. Jia Mingyuan went to Beijing to study computer.

The university in July is in the suburbs. Usually live in the school dormitory. You can go home and eat stewed pork ribs with radish made by your mother on weekends. Life has not changed much. Still peaceful and peaceful.

Try to make new friends in the new campus in July. Her concept of friends is vague. Because many women like her. July is a beautiful girl who is popular everywhere. Let's go to the dance together. Reserve seats for each other in the library. Or go shopping in the city on weekends. Watch a movie.

It's just plain. Like a passing river. You can't see what it brings. Or took something.

Just passing by.

And an sheng. An Sheng is the tide in her heart. Pain. Surging.

The photo of three people has been on the bedside since July. The sunshine is really brilliant. It was the sunshine three years ago. There are flowers in the wind. Have the person you love the most. Happy time in July is always fleeting.

Jia Ming will write twice a week. I'll call July at the weekend. He never asked An Sheng. But July always likes to talk about Ansheng to Jiaming. The address where she sent the letter was changed again and again, Jia Ming. From Hainan to Guangzhou, from Guangzhou to Xiamen. Last time I sent a postcard, it was still an unknown town.

She may not know where she can stay. Jia Ming said.

I'm afraid she's having a hard time. She is so unstable that life must be hard.

But she didn't ask you to send her money, did she? Okay, Zhu Liye. You should know that you are not the pillar of Ansheng. No one. She has the life she wants.

I was still worried in July. Sometimes she sees the tracks in the heavy rain in her dreams. She remembers the moment when she and Ansheng stood there. In fact, she had a hunch. This railroad track leading to a distant place will take Ansheng away one day. There are many cherry trees on campus. There are also very tall and big locust trees. In July, she thought, if An Sheng were here, would she still kick off her shoes and climb to the tree to look at the fields?

An Sheng sits on the branch at the top of the big camphor tree. The swirling wind in the open-air playground blows her white skirt like petals. An Sheng held out her hand and shouted, Come on, July. Her crisp voice still seems to ring in my ears. Every time I think of this scene in July, I feel gloomy.

In July, I studied painting in Guangzhou. A person rode a bicycle to the countryside to sketch, and the road was very broken and he fell down ... The party here was so crazy that I could jump until the early morning, just like a clockwork machine ... There was a flower tree with tiny petals that would fly in the wind. Like a golden shower ...

On July 5 th, he Ansheng

I broke up with PAM. I think I still can't stand him ... painting advertisements for others and painting them on billboards in tall buildings. Sunshine almost makes me dizzy ... I want to study in Shanghai. I think I like that city. ...

I thought I would drift forever. But how far is forever?

At the end of each letter, it says: Say hello to Jiaming.

I can't answer her letter or send anything in July. Her address is always changing. On her birthday in July, she sent a large bundle of rose buds for the first time. Once again, she sent a beautiful embroidered skirt of ethnic minorities. Then send her own oil painting again. The picture shows myself naked. Long hair turned into a fish.

There is a small print next to it: the sea is so cold.

It has been three years since she went out like this.

Two years have passed. In my junior year, I participated in the school debate in July. During the break, we talked about Yu Chunshun, who traveled around the world on foot or by bike. A boy said airily that these people are very melodramatic. Free and easy on the surface, weak on the inside. They have no ability to adapt to the real society.

So take an extremely evasive attitude. Nothing more than a decadent weak person.

It suddenly turned red in July. She stood up. You don't know them. You don't understand. They just feel lonely.

Loneliness. Guess what? July was a little tongue-tied because of anger. She raised her voice violently. She doesn't have what you have. But you can't give it to her Just like this world, it doesn't meet our dreams. But we can't give up our dreams. So I can only exile myself in this world.

That night, I saw the tranquility of teenagers in July. She was wearing a white skirt and dangling her legs in the tree. Long hair and skirts are flying in the wind. And her smiling face. But in July, I think, An Sheng should have changed a little. After all, An Sheng is 22 years old like her now. July, 22 years old, feeling a little fat. The beautiful oval face is a little round now. People have grown a lot.

She really misses An Sheng.

Just then, the phone rang. I think it may be Jiaming in July. Then listen, there is silence. July said, hello, go ahead. Then a girl's voice sounded slightly sandy. July, it's me. Who are you? July doubts.

I'm An Sheng. The girl laughed loudly.

An Sheng came to Shanghai all the way.

Please come to see me in July and take two days off. I miss you very much.

It was early in the morning when I arrived in Shanghai by boat in July. An Sheng is waiting for her at Shiliupu Pier. Far away, I saw a thin girl in July. With two thick braids hanging down to the waist. Wearing jeans, a black T-shirt and sneakers.

It runs in July. An Sheng stood there smiling at her. Flat bony face, brown skin like buckwheat, high forehead.

An Sheng was not a beautiful girl since she was a child, but she has a face with oriental flavor. Now that face has the beauty of vicissitudes. With a little mystery and indifference. Without any makeup. Only the eyebrows are trimmed thin and high.

An Sheng, you look like a Vietnamese woman now. July smiled and hugged her. I really like it.

But you are like a freshly dried peanut, which makes people want to take a bite. An Sheng smiled. Her eyes are black and bright. The teeth are still white.

This is the smile of the girl in the tree I saw in July.

An Sheng has really changed. Only the smile is still there.

An Sheng returned to her rented house with July. She shared a room with a group of college students from other places in Pudong. The rent in Shanghai is very expensive. An Sheng said. But she keeps her nest warm. Cotton sheets, tablecloths and curtains.

There is a round glass vase with white calla lilies beside the bed. I saw a group photo of the three of them in Woodenhead frame in July. An Sheng said that every time you change places, you can't take away too many things. But I have to take it with me. Because this is all I have. We just met Jia Ming then. We're all happy, right?

How is Jia Ming now? An Sheng asked.

He's fine. I will graduate soon. Now a company in Xi 'an invites him to work in the past.

He is an intern there, engaged in development.

Jia Ming is a big shot now. An Sheng smiled. In July, I dug out the photos Jia Ming sent to her from my bag and showed them to An Sheng. Jia Ming is wearing a small blue plaid shirt and standing in the sun. He used to look warm and clean.

An Sheng says he is the most handsome man I have ever seen. I was like this before I was sixteen. The same is true after sixteen. The night you took him to the bar, he appeared in the bar as if to calm all the noise.

Yes, he is a serious and simple good man.

Marry him in July. He married him as soon as he graduated.

On July 6, He Ansheng

But he really wants to stay in Beijing and develop. I don't want to go there You know, An Sheng, I don't want to leave my parents and family. And the city where we have lived for so many years. Although it is a little small, it is rich and beautiful, suitable for a dull life.

You like plain life?

Yes Ansheng, I have too many things in my hand to put down.

An Sheng smiled. She has been smoking. She started coughing. She touched the face of July. The skin on your face is so good in July.

My face was ruined by alcohol, tobacco and coffee. Selling an apartment during the day can only be done with heavy makeup. But my skin is as smooth as satin. You see, God gave me a dusty face. Fair enough.

Today is the weekend, let's go to the bar for a drink. An Sheng took out a black velvet coat. An Sheng, you don't wear white clothes. Said in July.

Now only black is suitable for my empty soul. An Sheng smiled. Then put gorgeous lipstick on the mirror.

They went to a noisy bar on the west side. An Sheng has always liked this loud music and crowded people. She ordered whisky and soda. People kept coming to say hello to her. Hello, Vivian. In July, I watched An Sheng speak a string of fluent English with a cigarette in front of several foreigners, and then laughed with them. July touched the ice water in her glass.

Suddenly she found that there really was a wide river between her and An Sheng. She knew that it was An Sheng standing on the other side of the river. But she can't cross it.

Looking at her white fingers in the bar in July. Their lives are completely different.

A thin middle-aged man in a blue shirt and yellow tie pushed over and smiled and said something to An Sheng. An Sheng answered him a few words and then came back. An Sheng, how long are you going to stay in Shanghai? Ask her in July.

I came to Shanghai mainly to earn some money. The real estate sales situation is very good recently. Of course, we still want journey to the south. Then go to Xing 'anling and Mohe.

Don't you want to go to Tibet to find inspiration for painting?

No. The quiet dark blue sky has been polluted by human noise. I have given up painting.

Why? You've always liked painting.

The painting I gave you on your birthday is my end. This cold sea is freezing me to death.

An Sheng drank another glass of wine.

What about you, July? Are you still writing? We used to take part in composition competitions, and you always won prizes. And my composition is always instructed as decadent and unhealthy. An Sheng smiled. But I think I write better than you.

Do you still like Hemingway? I read his novels on the trip. He gave me the greatest courage. I've always wondered what was in his mind when he put the shotgun in his mouth. Then I also started writing. July. I have been writing on the manuscript paper. Maybe some bookseller will let me publish this book one day. We were forced to throw away too many things. Writing is the way to save yourself. God shouldn't take it away.

This is another loud music. The dancing crowd screamed.

I have traveled all over South China, Southwest China and Central China. I have done almost any kind of work. Teaching in mountainous areas, painting portraits on the streets, dancing in bars, and painting advertisements outdoors. Sometimes a person is drunk for three days in a remote town and no one knows. I forgot where my home is. I broke up with my mother a long time ago. I think my home is in my soul.

But sometimes the soul is so empty. Sometimes it is so heavy. An Sheng smiled again. She almost finished a whole bottle of wine.

Why don't you find someone who loves you, An Sheng.

This man has always wanted to take me abroad. I am the boss of the real estate company where I work, and I am divorcing my wife. An Sheng finished the wine in the glass and pushed it to the bartender in the bar to pour it again. This man can be my father.

You can find a suitable man.

The right man? What is the right man? An Sheng looked up and smiled. Her voice began to hoarse from cigarettes and spirits. This meaning is too broad. Should his money, his soul, his feelings and his body be measured by it?

Actually, you know, July. An Sheng is close to July's face. As long as a man can look like a family, I am willing. But there is no more handsome and simple man in this world than Jia Ming. We can only meet one.

An Sheng, you are drunk. You can't drink any more. Push the bar to the bartender in July and signal him to take it back.

No. I want to drink more. I want to drink more. An Sheng threw herself on the bar. Only wine can keep me warm.

In July, treat me like a dead man from now on. I don't want to see you again Why I still think of you after so many years. But I don't want to miss you anymore. I'm leaving again. I'm so tired. I can't stop. An Sheng cried loudly.

Peace on July 7th.

July struggled to drag Ansheng out of the bar with tears in her eyes. The wind outside is very cold. An Sheng knelt on the ground and began to vomit. Her jade pendant fell out of her chest. The red silk thread turned gray. She wouldn't even take it off in the shower.

The only night we met, An Sheng slept soundly because of drunkenness. I can't sleep in July, but I can't talk to Ansheng. I can only be silent in the dark alone. They still sleep side by side as they did when they were children. But Ansheng will never hug her lovingly as before, burying her head in her arms and putting her hands and feet on her.

An Sheng curled up tightly.

Six years. Think about July.

Many nights. In the darkness and loneliness, An Sheng is used to hugging herself.

She is no longer the girl who will cry in her arms in July.

23 to 24 years old. I graduated in July and was assigned to work in a bank. An Sheng left Shanghai and continued to drift north.

Jia Ming stayed in Xi for development after graduation.

Jia Ming, please come back. In July, I told Jia Ming on the phone. We should get married.

Why can't you come to Beijing? July.

I just want to live a plain life. Know yourself, your parents and younger brother, a warm home, a stable job and a stable life. I don't want to go with the flow, I said in July, and suddenly I began to cry on the phone.

All right, all right. July. Let's go Jia Ming was in a hurry immediately.

You promised me, Jiaming. We should be together forever, not apart. Have you forgotten?

I haven't forgotten. Jia Ming was silent. I can finish this project next month, and then I will go home.

Thank you, Jia Ming. I know this may have an impact on your development. But we need to be together. Life will give back to us.