I think since you asked, you should have both personality and appearance. In terms of personality, I think everyone is different. There is no need to imitate others' changes. Just be yourself, so that you can attract a group of people who really appreciate you to get along with you comfortably without compromise. In terms of appearance, no matter whether you are a boy or a girl, as long as you are clean (wearing clothes and face) every day, I think there is no problem. If you are a girl, use more skin care products (suitable for you, you'd better buy them in a specialty store), change your hair style, read more books, take more exams, and practice by yourself from the inside out, and you will get better gradually.
Glad to answer this question? . Because there are many students with low self-esteem in primary and secondary schools, if this problem is solved, the national quality will be improved by leaps and bounds. So, first of all, I would like to thank the subject for raising a very valuable question for us.
There are many reasons for inferiority, and there are also many people who feel inferior because of their appearance. Some people are short, some are fat, and some have freckles. Some people take eight steps ... and so on, anything is possible. In short, I just can't accept my appearance, and I have been worried since then, and even thought about plastic surgery.
Everyone has a love of beauty, which is understandable. ? However, self-confidence is a great wealth in life that everyone can have, without any additional conditions. Self-confidence is more precious than appearance! Not all people with inferiority have noticed this!
You know, plastic surgery is risky, and there are countless cases of failure, and making yourself confident is a free panacea! It is a truth that people are beautiful because of self-confidence. Because self-confidence is an inner temperament that transcends appearance, it can be an inner motivation to challenge everything.
The so-called self-confidence means believing that you can do it and that you can be the best you can be. ? Then try to get close to the goal and realize the ideal. If everyone in the Chinese nation is full of confidence, wouldn't society be a great progress?
Son, I can understand your inner distress!
Like you, in high school, I once felt deeply inferior because of my appearance. I didn't understand why at that time. I just feel that I am not handsome enough and outstanding enough. I feel that the beauty of the world is far away from me, and I feel that "happiness is theirs and I have nothing". Even if there are good friends to play with, even if there are some happy things, that kind of happiness is very short-lived. The inner loneliness is like a deep night, and only occasionally can you see the scattered stars.
In order to cover up such feelings, I wrapped myself in a thick barbed armor. Pretend to be strong and get along with others, but I know that my heart is very fragile, very fragile, very sensitive to many things, and I have no mind to learn. ....................................................................................................................................
In those years, I kept thinking, if only I could be more handsome, more handsome. Only then will teachers like me, students of the opposite sex appreciate me, I will be confident in my work and have the courage to do what I want to do. In retrospect, there is a deep voice in my heart: I am ugly, I am not good enough, and I don't deserve the beautiful things in this world, which deeply interferes with me and affects my efforts.
So I went to the book to find the answer. I found in the book that many excellent people, in fact, are not outstanding in appearance, but because of self-confidence, and have also achieved extraordinary lives.
For example, Cao Cao recorded a short story in Shi Shuo Xin Yu. Once a Hun messenger came to visit Cao Cao. Cao Cao thought he was ugly and short, so he found a handsome guy and pretended to be a samurai. After the visit, Cao Cao sent someone to ask the Xiongnu emissary what he thought of Wang Wei. The messenger said that Wang Wei was handsome, and the samurai beside him must be a hero. Cao Cao laughed at once. I smiled when I saw this story, which showed that Cao Cao was ugly, but it didn't affect his success!
And Mother Teresa, who looks ordinary, has been running for the homeless all her life. In 2009, she was awarded one of the most respected winners in a century by the Nobel Foundation. A politician once recalled that when Mother Teresa walked into the hall, almost everyone's eyes were attracted by her. People's eyes moved with her movements, just like a magnet ... shining with love on her. Although she looks ordinary, it does not prevent her from becoming one of the most respected women in the world.
Tell you a more interesting and closer story. A true story is often told in various biographies of Ma Yun: When Ma Yun was unsuccessful, he went to talk about cooperation with Lei Jun. When Lei Jun saw Ma Yun's appearance, it was simply a pyramid scheme and he politely refused. However, Ma Yun has never denied himself because of his looks. He doesn't care about other people's comments, pursues his dreams and becomes one of the most attractive people in China. One thing Lei Jun regrets most is that he missed Ma Yun.
There are many similar stories. Appearance is not the only factor that determines a person's success, let alone his charm and influence.
Later, I began to realize that looks are given by heaven, and I can't change them, but I can completely change other aspects.
So, I began to change what I could. For example, I will make myself more tolerant, start to put down my baggage and study hard, start to play my strengths to help others, and start to take off my armor and actively integrate. . . . . . . . Life then slowly begins to change!
As I grow older, I understand more. I gradually understand that in this world, in fact, the vast majority of people have an inferiority complex in some ways, which is related to everyone's growth experience. Some aspects of people's inferiority complex are just labels that others put on themselves when they were young, and they believe them; We can totally tear it off.
Later, I understood better that no matter how beautiful a face is when I was young, it will grow old slowly, and no matter how beautiful a flower is, it will fade slowly. If you only rely on the self-confidence accumulated by looks, you will collapse one day.
Until now, I have continued to learn and grow, and I have been helping others with psychology. I found that teachers and parents didn't lie to us. The person with the most beautiful soul is the most beautiful!
Therefore, I am glad that I understand these truths. I share my feelings with you, my child. You are beautiful, so you don't need to look outside, because everyone's soul is born beautiful!
Pay attention to what Yong Qi said, and learn more about educational psychology.
As a high school student, you should focus on your studies, because your appearance cannot be changed. Your appearance is given by your parents, your clothes are issued by the school, and your hairstyle is stipulated by the school. What else can you change? Only by doing your own study well can teachers and classmates respect you.
The reason for inferiority is not because of appearance, but what needs to be changed is your inner view of yourself.
You can dress yourself up deliberately, but don't feel inferior.
I'll tell you a story: Mr. Yu's New Oriental was looking for a chief financial officer during the critical period of listing in the United States, and finally decided on three. One is particularly ugly, but Mr. Yu took a fancy to him, of course, because his ability and conversation far exceeded his appearance. Facts have proved that the criteria chosen by Mr. Yu are correct. Ability and self-restraint are far greater than looks.
Accept your looks and build your strength. And this thing will look more pleasing to the eye if you get along with it for a long time, provided that you are really good at working.