Don't let your wrong behavior increase your child's vanity. Children cannot grow up without the care of their families. Parents should face problems with their children. The baby is born like a blank sheet of paper, and the cultivation at this time will benefit the child in the future. Share it with everyone. Don't let your wrong behavior increase your child's vanity.
Don't let your wrong behavior increase your child's vanity. Phenomenon 1: "They go to American summer camp, why can we only go to Southeast Asia?"
On Ms. Sun's "Summer Bill", the reporter saw that among the expenses of remedial classes, the expenses of two training classes and interest classes were 1500 yuan, among the travel expenses, the expenses of going to the seaside in Thailand were 6,000 yuan, and among the expenses of clothing and school supplies, the planned expenses were 1500 yuan. Before the summer vacation began, my son put forward new requirements. A classmate attended the American summer camp 18 days, and he also wanted to sign up. It costs about 30 thousand yuan. This made Ms. Sun, a dual-employee family, sigh "I can't afford to hurt", and her son's complaint also made her sad: "Why can I only travel to Southeast Asia?"
Phenomenon 2: "I want what my friends have."
After the summer vacation, there are many children playing downstairs in the community, and Ms. Liu will also take her daughter to such social activities on time. Children will share new toys, digital products and other novelty items. "Who bought a box of imported building blocks today, who bought an iPad tomorrow, she wants whatever people buy." After repeatedly educating her daughter against comparison, the child's attitude is still uncooperative, showing frustration. On one occasion, the child even asked, "Mom, does our family have no money?"
Tips: Children's evaluation criteria for things come from you.
Mu Yun, Master of Education, Special Education Consultant in Yanma. Com, saying that in fact, children's evaluation criteria for things come from their parents, and parents often reveal their evaluation of certain things in chat (such as expensive cars and high-end foreign tours). Children can easily absorb their parents' thoughts and values. As parents, we should educate our children to be diligent and thrifty from an early age, start from the details and set an example. Otherwise, when children reach a certain age, questions such as "Why do others have me but not" and "Will other children look down on me" will follow.
How to answer the question of children? Mu Yun believes that parents should educate their children from an early age. Everyone is different, and they should respect their children's feelings without coercion. Over time, children will learn to respect their parents' feelings. For example, when he asks, "Why do others have me?" You can tell your child that you don't have what he has, and he doesn't have what you have. What exactly do you want? When shopping, if parents think the price is expensive, they can tell their children directly: it's not that I can't afford it, but that I think it's expensive and not worth buying.
Don't compare children with "other people's children"
Jia Jia, a senior child-rearing expert, believes that some parents like to attack their children's shortcomings with the advantages of "other people's children", such as "she is really good-looking and has really good grades. It's up to you. It's easy for competitive children to blindly compare in the short term. Long-term frequent use will greatly weaken their self-confidence or lead to rebellious psychology. In fact, every child's personality and characteristics are different. Parents should know more about their children's advantages and encourage them. When criticizing children, we should also pay attention to treating mistakes as learning opportunities rather than accusations, thus establishing children's sense of security.
Ms. Huang, a parent, told the reporter that when a child makes a request, he should first consider whether the request is reasonable and whether the objective situation allows it. If it is reasonable, he might as well meet the child's requirements, which is helpful for parent-child communication. If the reality is impossible, you should fully communicate with your child and explain the situation, instead of directly rejecting it. It is suggested to make a summer vacation consumption plan and implement it with children. You can get unplanned consumption through social practices such as helping the family do housework and work-study programs, so that children can experience the hardships of making money and cultivate their financial management ability. After consumption, you can give children psychological guidance and tell them that it is useful to buy this thing, and don't compare it with others.
Don't let your wrong behavior increase your child's vanity. First of all, children's vanity is acquired. Whether a child has vanity is mainly influenced by the family environment. Children's excessive vanity has a lot to do with their parents' doting. From the above story, we can easily see that the child's vanity stems from his parents' doting, and the frustration of refusing to buy a mobile phone is enough to make him choose to commit suicide.
Under what circumstances is it easy to breed children's vanity?
The first type: parents think that as long as they give their children everything they want, they love them. If they have any material needs, they will try their best to meet them. This kind of expression can easily make children's values deviate from the right track and push them to the road of simply pursuing material enjoyment.
Second, parents like to buy famous brands for their children to show their status and taste. When they see other people's children dressed more beautifully, they think that their children can't fall behind others and are extremely extravagant about their own food and clothing. This practice invisibly instills in children the concept of "my family has money" and breeds their vanity.
The third type: parents are not well-off, but they are worried that their children will be looked down upon. Therefore, when children say that others have something, they will try to buy one for their children, no matter how much it costs. In this way, children will mistakenly think that face is the most important thing, and when they grow up, they may make a lot of inappropriate behaviors for their glamorous appearance.
When children's vanity is too strong, parents must analyze the reasons, guide children to treat their study and life correctly, and set out from reality to encourage children to overcome the bad habit of vanity. Parents should not despise their vain children, but should take necessary measures to correct them:
1, control children's material needs
Controlling children's material needs, we can't let children get whatever they want, which has nothing to do with family economy. Parents should guide and correct their children's bad habits of pursuing clothes and vanity. If children are found to require their own consumption in order to keep up with their classmates, parents can directly refuse their request.
2. Let children understand that Excellence does not come from material comparison.
Explore children's specialties, let them learn a specialty, improve their academic performance, and guide them to help others. These activities can bring children a sense of honor and concern, and also win the favor of others.
Children's behavior is most influenced by their parents.
If parents are vain, then children will follow suit, and it is easy to get into the bad habit of vanity. To change children, you must first change yourself. Parents should give their children a correct demonstration in life and seize the right opportunity to make them realize vanity and not bring real happiness to their children.
Vanity is the enemy that distorts children's psychology. When parents find that children begin to breed vanity, they should educate their children in time, put out bad psychological cognition, and start from small things to guide and correct their behavior.