Letter from Liu Yong to his daughter 1 Dear child.
When I left, what I left you was not rich family wealth, vast land and rich living room, but just a bookshelf full of books. In those old books, you will find my sweaty hands, traces of broken corners, records on the title page, and eyebrows in the text. They may include several fonts younger than the old ones, representing my records of different eras; Their content may be arbitrary and passionate, which must be what I said when I was young; Their handwriting may be trembling and askew, and I wrote it while lying in bed. Of course, you may also find that there are warm words about your mother written by me, which must be the masterpiece of many books I read during my love.
Dear child! I left these books for you, not to impress your father to read so many books, not to force you to agree with the criticism, but because they reflect my life and attitude towards learning. If you miss me, touch them! If you admire me, worship them! If you envy me, read it! Buy more books if you want to surpass me!
Parent word
The second part of Liu Yong's letter to his daughter is calm.
Liu Yong
? Normal heart? Want to? Normal? Prepare, not cram.
? Normal heart? What else? Peace of mind? Let your heart always remain calm, so that you can have a persistent response.
Normal mind
? The biological science exam will be held the day after tomorrow, and I'm so nervous. ? You said with a frown at dinner.
? Have a normal heart. ? Let me give a brief answer first, and then I will add: Your mother and I are in a normal state of mind, so we don't ask you much when we know that you have an exam, for fear that you will be more nervous and have no normal state of mind because we ask.
? What is a normal heart? I don't understand. ? You say.
All right! I tell you with a normal heart!
? Normal heart? Just like those three words, right? Normal heart? , is it? Normal mood? . For example, you usually eat an egg and a piece of bread for breakfast and sleep for seven hours at night; During the exam, I also slept for seven hours as usual, and ate an egg and a piece of bread in the morning, which showed that I had a normal heart.
As for people with mental disorders, they may only sleep for five hours when they meet the exam. In order to increase their physical strength in the morning, they will eat an extra egg, a piece of bread, a glass of juice and a banana. Drink a bottle of chicken essence when you arrive at the examination room. As a result, guess what?
Because his lifestyle is different from peacetime, because he sleeps less, his metabolism is bad, and he eats too much and is not used to it. Instead, I may have a stomachache in the examination room.
Once I vomited because I didn't have a normal heart when I took a college listening test; The day I once hosted a special program on TV, I had two big bags on my face because I had no normal heart.
Why?
Because I bought several bottles of healthy drinks to replenish my strength before the exam. Drinks are mainly amino acids, which I'm not used to. As for the host, it was because I looked in the mirror the night before and saw a few pimples, which were not well squeezed and inflamed.
I usually squeeze acne with little inflammation. Why did something go wrong that day?
It's simple, because there is no normal heart.
Usually I can squeeze if I want. Anyway, it won't matter the next day, and it doesn't matter if there are many people. But that day, I wanted to squeeze, but I didn't dare to squeeze, for fear that I wouldn't squeeze well. As a result, I didn't dare to squeeze hard and didn't squeeze clean, which led to inflammation the next day.
So I said, you should have a normal mind, what is your usual habit, and if you keep it like that before the exam, there will be no problem.
I even suggest that you go to bed at the usual time. Even if you are ready, don't go to bed early because you want to sleep for a few more hours, because too many people have learned this lesson, that is, when something big happens the next day, you go to bed early, neither sleepy nor nervous, but it will lead to insomnia.
Didn't mom say it at dinner?
When she was a student, she didn't wash her hair before the exam and didn't wear new clothes and shoes on the day of the exam.
When I was a student, like her, it was also a manifestation of maintaining a normal heart. Because when you pay too much attention to clothes, or wear clothes and shoes that you are not used to, or cut your hair that you are not used to, it will affect the exam.
For example, when I was a child, I once took part in a speech contest in Taipei, especially when I wore new clothes and shoes that day, which almost caused problems.
My crotch cracked with a click because I bent down to tie my shoelaces. When I sewed my trousers and hurried out, I found that the leather shoes were new, hard and painful, which caused me to limp on the stage.
Don't you think an unusual heart is self-defeating?
After most of my life, I feel that the more unusual things I encounter, the more I should have a normal heart.
So the day before cholecystectomy, I wrote articles, read books and watched TV plays as usual, and slept at the same time as usual; Before going abroad every time, I have to sleep, get up and play ball at the same time as usual.
I've seen too much! Many people are in a hurry to arrange their unfinished business before traveling abroad; The night before boarding the plane, I went to socialize, eat and drink, and packed my bags until late at night. I sprained my waist before going abroad. After boarding the plane, I began to have diarrhea. Besides, I didn't have enough rest before going abroad, and I caught a cold in a few days.
Maybe you have to say, of course, housework should be arranged and luggage should be packed.
Yes! This is exactly what I want to emphasize.
The more unusual things you will face, the more you should make arrangements early and spread the unusual burden enough in advance. Just like an exam, if you want to be normal, you should prepare early at ordinary times; Be calm before going abroad, plan ahead, or even pack your bags two or three days ago; If you want to wear new clothes, you should try them on early, or even put on your shoes and take a walk to see if you can move. Will the foot step on the skirt horn again?
? Normal heart? Want to? Normal? Prepare, not cram.
? Normal heart? What else? Peace of mind? Only by maintaining inner peace can we change with constancy.
So only people who are usually hard-working and sober are qualified to speak? Normal heart? .
Talk about it.
Look at the students around you, especially Jews and China. Don't they all try their best to help their children with their lessons, let them volunteer in the hospital, find various subjects for their children online, participate in science competitions, and even find teachers to teach their children tennis, fencing, swimming and skating, and establish award-winning records, so as to strive to be admitted to the prestigious Ivy League schools?
Desire to be a personal master
? I'm not the only one who procrastinates, and neither is the teacher. ?
Today, while reading the article I wrote yesterday, you protested that the teacher was slow to start school and said a lot of nonsense. Before the end of the term, they tried their best to catch up with the progress. The teacher is in a hurry, so we have to catch up, so we are all very busy before the final exam. ?
Say that finish, then you bow your head, then you look up and ask: Then why do children in Taiwan Province Province have to go to bed first? What are you sleeping for? He can't sleep at night. ?
I just smiled and said, who are you? People who are full don't know if they are hungry. Let me ask you, if you only sleep for five hours at night, even if you go home for an hour and a half, it will only add up to six and a half hours. Will you be unable to sleep at night? I also tell you how hard the children in Taiwan Province Province are. They often have to read several different versions of the same subject. They not only attend classes earlier than you, but also finish classes later than you every day. They often stay at school to make up lessons until eight or nine o'clock.
Open your eyes and ask why it is so bitter.
Kid! I often complain that China people push their children so hard, forcing them to wear nearsighted glasses early, and even forcing them to commit suicide by jumping off a building.
I also made a comparison and found that the health status of my generation is not as good as that of the previous generation. The reason is that the previous generation lived in the environment of World War II, and they often had to avoid bombing and change schools, and there were many? Intermediate breathing? Opportunity. On the contrary, I was born in Taiwan Province Province on 1949. The war has passed, but there are fewer schools, more students, and the pressure of entrance examination is great, so the so-called? Catch up? .
When I was a child, I often stayed in school to make up lessons. In my memory, I always see the picture of carrying a heavy schoolbag, which contains graphic arithmetic and going home at night.
Can you imagine that when you were studying dance, singing, piano and violin, and still in the sixth grade every day, many children in Taiwan Province Province went to cram schools to make up lessons?
More children than in Taiwan Province province! The mainland is the same. I have been to a famous middle school, and the principal proudly said that more than 90% of their graduates can be admitted to key universities. He also said that they built a house on the hillside, and all the senior three students were sent there to live in the school, just like scholars used to study hard in temples in the mountains.
Not only a famous school, I went to a primary school in a poor area in the deep mountains of Guangxi one year, where the school buildings were dilapidated and the children were dressed in colorful clothes? Hundred clothes? . But do you know that the children there actually told me that they only saw lights and moonlight?
They say that they get up to study before dawn every day, and stay in school after sunset, so it is rare to see the sun. It is said that because the land is barren, some students only have one set of clothes to wear as guests, and everyone takes turns to wear them; Some people are even so poor that they have no clothes to wear and no quilt cover. When it is cold, they hide in the haystack.
But those parents are still desperate to send their children to school and pay? Tuition? And then what? Substitute teacher fee? .
In recent years, I have visited many schools in remote areas of Chinese mainland. In addition to the Hope Primary School we donated, I have also been to minority areas in Guizhou and schools built in caves in Shanxi.
It's too bitter. A teacher's salary in a month may not be enough to watch two movies. Two children in a family may take turns to go to school because they can't afford the tuition.
However, I found that they all work hard, their parents can't read, but they all know how to force their children to study.
Gradually, I understand. Ten years of cold window, nobody cares, famous all over the world? 、? The book has its own golden house, and the book has its own Yan Ruyu? The idea of studying hard to get ahead has been deeply rooted in the hearts of China people. Even if there are more schools now, and the admission rate in Taiwan Province Province is over 100%, everyone still has to fight.
Why?
Because you want to go to a good school, because you want to? Be strong? .
Son, what do you really need to understand?
Look at the students around you, especially Jews and China. Don't they all try their best to tutor their children, let them volunteer in hospitals, find various subjects for their children online, take part in science competitions, and even find teachers to teach them tennis, fencing, swimming and skating, so as to establish award-winning records, so as to win admission to prestigious Ivy League schools?
As a result, Jews were ostracized everywhere during World War II. Today, although they are a minority in American society, they have a pivotal position. Chinese Americans can become the ethnic group with the highest average education level in the United States and have made outstanding achievements in all aspects.
America is free, so free that you can choose to be a scavenger or a university professor; The United States is also open, and street sweepers can earn more than university professors. The United States is still equal and has no respect for positions. As long as you work hard, you can live a good life.
However, there are some ethnic groups, especially those who have experienced hardships. Whether in China or the United States, they naturally have a force in their hearts.
Strive to be a personal master!
Talking about sleeping eyes
When you enter senior three, you will feel that time is not enough.
You should use the urgency of time to force yourself to become more efficient, instead of procrastinating in a vicious circle and losing sleep and health.
Who doesn't want to sleep and wake up naturally
At seven o'clock this morning, your mother's alarm clock rang and woke me up, but she glanced at the alarm clock and went back to sleep. I guess there must be more time, so I didn't say anything. Until half an hour passed, before she got up, she pushed her and asked her what time she wanted to get up. Mom woke up, looked at the clock, immediately jumped up and said, oh, no! Why didn't you hear the alarm clock? It's already 7: 30. You must get to school at 7: 50.
Seeing my mother rushing to the bathroom to comb her hair, I ran to your room first, thinking that you must be ready. Unexpectedly, you are still under the covers. I asked you why you didn't get up. You said you would get up soon, I said it was past 7: 30, and you sat up immediately with a wow. While dressing in a hurry, I was wondering why my mother didn't call you and why you pressed the alarm clock yourself.
Seeing that your hair is not tied properly, I grabbed a banana and hurried out with my mother. I think it is necessary to talk to you about your sleep plan.
Recently, I often hear you complain about lack of sleep, too much homework and exams at school, and why you always need to sleep for eight hours. You also said that you envy those students who only sleep for five or six hours a day.
In fact, you don't have to blame yourself for sleeping too much, because you are growing up, and adolescent children should sleep more. ? Growth hormone? Most of them are secreted during sleep, so if you don't sleep well, it will easily affect your development.
For those fully developed older children, they don't need much sleep. Recently, I saw a statistic that American high school students generally only sleep for six hours. Looking back on your brother's high school days, he even slept less than five hours a day, but they still developed well. When you get through this. Rapid growth period? Naturally, I won't be so sleepy.
So, you can't get up from sleep now, not necessarily because you are lazy, but because of your physiological needs. So I suggest you review it, okay? While awake? Hurry up, so you can go to bed earlier, instead of cutting back on sleep time.
Everyone procrastinates.
As China people often say, a delay is a lifetime? If you don't work hard, the boss will be sad? That was when I was a teenager.
Again, there is a one-month delay. Aren't you busy before the end of each semester? That's because the first half of the semester was relatively easy, which led to the accumulation of homework.
No matter how small it is, there is actually a one-day delay.
For example, yesterday, you didn't go home until after six o'clock because you joined the school club. First, you sit on the sofa and watch TV cartoons. Then you went to eat. After dinner, you walk into the room. I have something to ask you. I thought you were doing your homework, but I found you asleep in bed. When you wake up, you sit there in a daze, blaming yourself for sleeping and making you lose your temper.
All right! Let's go back and calculate, how much time did you spend watching TV when you first got home? How long did you take a nap after dinner? How long did it take to open the bag, lazily take out the book, turn on the computer and check the mailbox?
If you condense this time, take out the things in your schoolbag before entering the door, see how much homework you have, have a plan in mind, and look at your own? Email. Then, while eating, watch TV. After eating, I quickly looked up information on the Internet and began to write a report. Can you stay up until after one o'clock again?
Therefore, people who always put off going to bed very late are often not really short of time, but because of the delay in front.
People are wonderful, and you will find that you pay special attention to reading before the exam. You will also find that if there are five kinds of homework a day, it will take you an hour and a half to do the first one, an hour to do the second one, 50 minutes to do the third one and 40 minutes to do the fourth one. When you are the fifth, look at the time. It's very late, about 20 minutes.
But on the other hand, if you do the fifth lesson backwards, and then do the fourth, third and fifth, it may take you many hours, but the first one only takes 30 minutes.
This is also because the mood is relaxed, causing procrastination; You may not feel obvious, but you will find it after careful comparison.
Think along this road, if you start from the beginning, use? It's already midnight? If you are in a good mood, will you be very efficient and save a lot of time?
I once did an experiment on a middle school student in Taiwan Province Province.
He is busier than you in homework, and he doesn't get enough sleep every day. He often falls asleep on the sofa when he comes home. After being pulled up, he often has to be in a daze for a long time before he can enter the working state.
His mother came to talk to his father, saying that children always lack sleep, and if they don't take a nap first, the effect of reading is very poor; Let the children sleep for a while first, and then they will stay up late because they start too late.
I suggested that she make a statistic for the child: you try. When the child enters the door, let him sleep first, then get up for dinner and do his homework. When will this lead to going to bed? On the other hand, you forbid him to go to bed first and ask him to start his homework early. What time does he go to bed?
Guess what the result is?
The result is: if she lets the child sleep for 90 minutes first, the child will sleep at one o'clock; She wouldn't let the child go to bed first, so the child went to bed at half past twelve.
I slept for 90 minutes and went to bed half an hour late. Let me ask you, where did the extra hour go?
I'm sure you can guess, because it was towed away.
The child found that there was still time, so he did it slowly. Why don't you get some sleep first? Start? It's late. It's late. I pay attention when I'm nervous.
Do you know that?/You know what?
Because the child slept for 90 minutes first, it not only added up to more sleep time, but also because he was in good spirits and clear-headed, so he didn't sleep first, and his performance in going to bed at 12: 30 improved a lot.
Kid! When you enter the third year of high school, you will feel that time is not enough and you have to reduce your sleep. If you want to have a good sleep, you may want to make a sleep and work plan for yourself.
You should use the urgency of time to force yourself to become more efficient, instead of procrastinating in a vicious circle and losing sleep and health.
note:
If you want to? Take a nap? Can we have it? Sleep? It is best to sleep for 60 to 90 minutes at a time.
According to the comprehensive report of the American World Journal on June 24th, 2003, several psychologists, led by Professor Sarah Mednick of Harvard University, found that the visual learning ability after a nap 1 hour to 90 minutes is much higher than that of people who don't sleep.
The analysis report published in the journal Nature Neuroscience also suggests that the benefits of taking a nap are just experience? Slow wave sleep? And then what? Rapid eye movement? People can enjoy it. Because these two kinds of sleep can refresh the mind and help to deal with newly learned skills and information.
The research report even said? From the point of view of behavior improvement, taking a nap is as useful as taking a night off in the study of intuitive impression. ? Napping can also improve the effect of sleeping at night. The experiment shows that the memory of the subjects who took a nap on the first day is 50% stronger than that of the subjects who didn't take a nap after 24 hours.
In addition, according to the research of many sleep experts, we can know? Rapid eye movement? (also known as REM for short, the time when the eyes keep turning under the eyelids when dreaming. ) it is very good for eliminating tension and enhancing learning effect before going to bed. It is easier to be awakened during rapid eye movement than during deep sleep before rapid eye movement.
REM usually appears 60 to 90 minutes after sleep, so if possible, it is best to take a 90-minute nap. If the child comes home from school, if he is tired, it is much better to let him sleep for 90 minutes than just 20 minutes.
In addition, we should make use of the advantages of REM to enhance our memory, such as reading a book before going to bed, or reciting a text, then sleeping for 90 minutes, thinking about what we read before going to bed after getting up, or reviewing it, which may get twice the result with half the effort.
Grow by yourself and succeed by yourself.
On June 25, after lunch, I lay on the sofa reading the newspaper as usual, staring out of the corner of my eye at the door to welcome my daughter home from school.
But suddenly my heart was shocked. I don't have to wait for my daughter today, because I sent her to a concentration camp more than 300 miles away from home the day before yesterday.
That's not a real concentration camp, but 60 years old? May Domonte Music Summer Camp? . Every summer vacation, young people from all over the world receive devil training there; The world's top masters Paalmann, Yo-Yo Ma and Yan Jianyan all came from there.
The Music Camp covers an area of more than 200 mu, among which are scattered dormitories converted from stables. The roof is made of iron. Because the stable was not high, it was changed to two floors, and you can reach out and touch the ceiling. Coupled with the surprisingly small windows, the room can only be turned around. You can imagine how hot it will be when the sun shines in summer. What is even more frightening is the rules in the camp.
At 7 o'clock in the morning, what will the supervisor say? Prison guard? Knock on the door from room to room until the students open the door. At 7: 30, I will walk to a restaurant hundreds of feet away for dinner. At 8: 30 sharp, you must go back to your small room and start practicing.
The warden patrolled the corridor all day, knocking at the door to warn anyone who didn't hear the piano; Then don't move Remember? ; As long as you score two points, you will be grounded on weekends.
I really don't understand why I want to go in, because I am spoiled and think I am the daughter of the little princess.
Before entering the camp, I asked her again and again, have you forgotten? How comfortable it is to be at home during the summer vacation, why bother? I can't go home for seven weeks, and I'm not allowed to visit relatives at ordinary times. My phone is blocked, I'm not allowed to bring my computer, and I can't say I miss home. What a pity!
The daughter didn't even think about it, and turned her head: I will go! ?
On the day I entered the camp, at 35 degrees Celsius, I sneaked into her room and took a look, sweating with heat. When I came out, I asked her if she was going home. She turned and said, No. ?
When we left, my daughter was waiting in line to hand in the medical form and waved us away. I secretly looked to see if she was crying. She didn't even have red eyes and said she was so excited.
I got on the bus and slowly left the campus. I kept looking back, but the precious daughter who claimed to be reluctant to part with her parents turned her back on us.
There are actually many of these in America? Concentration camp? There are music, sports, literature and science. Why? One is willing to fight and the other is willing to suffer? There are so many young people who try their best to get in and accept abuse.
I've been thinking about this a lot since my daughter entered the camp? Do you want to stay in women's universities? , also? Is it too big to keep? When my son sent him to Harvard, I cried when I left, didn't he? Watch? Am I leaving?
They are so heartless because they are excited to leave their parents; Or is it because there are too many challenges to face? People who suffer have no right to be pessimistic? .
I did, put my home aside and came to America alone; At the airport, even my classmates cried, but I didn't cry, because I had to bear the suffering ahead alone. They stayed at home and lived a quiet life, but I became a drifter.
But why does every young man have to wander, dream that he is a stranger, and think that loneliness and danger are cool? Is this a natural impulse?
It is this impulse that made human ancestors walk out of the earliest Africa, traveled all over the world, and even landed on the moon, believing that they would reach Mars one day.
It was this impulse that made the princes and princesses walk out of their father's castle, jumped on horseback and left, regardless of their parents' cries.
I often think: parents should stay and children should go; Parents want to make decisions for them, but they just won't listen. Does this mean that they have young people's ideas, or should they be called rebellion?
A good card is what parents say, take the road paved by adults, take over the business at home and be a good one? Filial piety? And then what? Shun? Son, is it not good?
I often wonder: If I were Bill Gates' father and knew that my child would drop out of Harvard in his sophomore year, would I support him? If I were Ang Lee's father and knew my son was going to make a movie, would I stop him? If I stop it, will there be Microsoft President Bill Gates and director Ang Lee?
Is it because the child is young that we should let him go out and find what he wants and let them find it themselves? Instead of opening the lid and saying, Come on! This is what you are looking for. ?
When my son was a child, I played a strong role for a while, helping him arrange everything.
But after all these years, have you seen that American? Free economy? And the spirit of democracy. I found that everyone has their own characteristics, advantages, and their own instinct to go out and make their own way, as well as their own instinct to suffer hardships.
The best education is to give full play to these advantages.
This book is the product of my new educational idea. On the surface, it is the same as traditional education, but what is the potential proposition? Free education? .
I know China's parents force their children. I'm not telling them not to work hard, but teaching them? Success depends on your own success just as growth depends on your own growth? . Let them push themselves, instead of making a car without batteries, just waiting for their parents and teachers to push behind.
These two days, every time I passed my daughter's room and saw her princess bed, I wanted to cry. But I know that my two and a half arms can't keep her thousands of miles in life.